The Island (2005)

The Island (2005) is primarily known for two things — first, it’s the lowest grossing movie of Michael Bay’s entire directing career and secondly, it rips off the movie Parts: The Clonus Horror (1979), infamously featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000. Despite the fact that this flick also draws inspiration from the successful pics Fahrenheit 451 (1966), THX 1138 (1971) and Logan’s Run (1976), the box office bomb received mixed reviews at best, partly due to its prevelent product placement. Not to be confused with the sci-fi series The Island (2020-2024) or the thriller The Island (2023) starring Michael Jai White, Mr. Bay’s sci-fi action thriller centers around Lincoln Six Echo (Ewan McGregor), who is working in what amounts to be a high-tech labor camp in the dystopian future. Even though he dreams of one day escaping to the titular paradise, Lincoln is actually a clone of a wealthy man who will eventually mine him for parts to keep living. When he realizes his fate, Lincoln teams up with his crush Jordan Two Delta (Scarlett Johansson) to escape their indentured servitude and find out if there really is an island out there somewhere. Along the way, we encounter Albert Laurent (Djimon Hounsou), Dr. Merrick (Sean Bean), James “Mac” McCord (Steve Buscemi), and Starkweather Two (Michael Clarke Duncan). The R rated flick also features Chris Ellis, Ethan Phillips, Kim Coates, Shawnee Smith, and Mr. McGregor’s McHairy McChest! As you can guess, Mr. Man, would love to harvest the hunky bod on arousing Ewan!